To me, one of the most powerful elements of chip music is its ability to evoke a narrative. I’m not sure why, and I’m not sure if it is standard for most listeners of the genre, but I have the feeling that it is. With this mindset, STFUAJPGM was born. And now, after 13 episodes and a lack of time to curate new episodes,  it is to die.

Thanks to the dozens of artists who allowed us to use their work, the tens of thousands who have visited the site, and most importantly to all of the great folks who showed interest in the project (I had no idea STFUAJPGM would be this popular). A special thanks to B. Leo, who has been copy editing my chip inspired rambles for quite some while.

If you’d like to keep up to date on my future endeavors, feel free to follow me on Twitter, or check out my website.

It’s been fun!

-Steve Jenkins aka Crystal Labs

PS.: If you’d like to help keep this site hosted for archival purposes, feel free to donate:

An explorer travels two directions at once.

Act 1:

Act 2:

Act 3:

Act 4:

Act 5:

Act 6:

Act 1:

It felt foreign to me. A feeling of deep sadness. A feeling that had an endless bottom, and was filled to the brim with a substance that reeked. I stared into it for quite some while before finally testing out its temperature with my palm. My body shuttered as I was pulled into the void.

Act 2:

Drifting in and out of consciousness, I tried opening my eyes hoping to grasp an understanding of my surroundings. The only sight I was able to see was my hair waving slowly in the viscous pool that my body inhabited. Beyond it, a blackness looked back at me. It was probably wondering the same things I was wondering about it. Instead of watching, I listened. I heard the voices of my childhood friends as we played in the front yard. I had never missed my friends this much.

Act 3:

I awoke. Against my back was a wall, thickly covered in a dark colored moss that seemed to breathe in sync with my own breath. I looked ahead and saw a dimly lit and narrow tunnel. I trudged forward, feeling the same vile slime creep into the spaces between my toes. Within a few steps, I came to the conclusion that this was where nightmares were created.

Act 4:

At the opposite end of the tunnel I hit another wall. It felt different than the others. A familiar but disturbing texture – thickly woven, but never providing warmth. I sat in silence for a moment when two eyes opened in front of my own. I fell backwards, as the mouth of the beast made itself seen, letting forth a sinister shriek. I stood, turned, and began to flee. There was no need to look back, as the hideous face would be burned into my mind for the rest of time. As I ran, I could hear the creature’s four feet charging a path behind me.

Act 5:

I fell to my knees and instantly began to silently weep. I felt the beast’s breath pounding against my neck. I expected the pain of a thousand deaths if its teeth were to sink into my back. Instead I felt a wetness slide across my face. I turned and looked towards my captor, only to find a hulking puppy. What once was a beast became an adorable comrade. I smiled as my new companion both panted and wagged his tail.

Act 6:

I reached out and touched his face. He closed his eyes in comfort. I climbed atop his back. He began to move forward. His feet moved gracefully. I understood that he was here to protect me. Together, we began our journey back home.

Credits:

4mat: Lost

Hunters: Breathe

E.S.C.: Dahlia Bisected

Zan-zan-zawa-veia: Moon Down

i, cactus: Ruby Cactus

little-scale: Peace on Earth 2

Art: “Mantarilla” by Helm

“The Emporer’s Snuff Box” Art by Raquel Meyers. Music by Tubular Balls.

Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Act 1:

For centuries, we had watched the body of water adjacent to our small town. Eventually, rumors of a new life form growing beneath its murky surface had begun to run rampant. Some said that, when the time was right, it would make itself seen. The Creature’s hypothesized description was astounding:  a body made made of flesh. This idea was completely foreign to a civilization like ours, as our bodies weren’t composed of organic materials. Instead they were carefully composed of the circuits, transistors and various bits of technology that had driven our people towards a bright and efficient future.

Act 2:

Upon first sight, the creature appeared abhorrent. It slowly crawled along the shore, leaving a sticky trail behind. In time, we gathered our courage and approached the Creature. We wiped the viscous fluid away from its thickly covered body, and only then did the Creature from the pond seem much less alien. It had two legs, two arms and two eyes. As it opened its mouth, a startling sound escaped it. This sound (twenty years later) would be referred to as “crying.”

Act 3:

In time, the Creature eventually became classified as human. We tended to its needs in an attempt to make it as happy as possible. We noticed that it grew in ways we never thought imaginable. We machines found it hard to comprehend that the human body had an ability to become larger without outside intervention. One of its more fascinating features was the scraggly hair that hung from its face some 40 years after its discovery.

Act 4:

80 years since birth had passed. The human lay still on the ground as we observed his final moments. His eyes became vacant and his breath more jagged. When his chest fell for what should have been the final time, we turned to one another after already reaching a  unanimous conclusion: we can save him. He can live forever.

Act 5:

300 years after birth, the Creature could no longer be referred to as human. He had a mixed physiology: half man, half machine. His heart now beat at 60 cycles per minute. His muscles were powered by a stronger energy source. His eyes could see past a physical reality and into unknown dimensions. We no longer feared his death, but instead celebrated his second birth.

Credits:

Chromelodeon: Aluminum

Teleidofusion: Petite Appetite

Starscream: Gravity in Terms of Space

Statikz (feat. The J. Arthur Keenes Band): Let’s Go to Tokyo

The Shortsleeves: Rabbit Feet

Art by Emthree

Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Act 1:

The gate crashed open. The legions of T’dar-Glom flooded the frontal sector of Aegnar, pulverizing all nearby buildings with brutal precision. Screeching battle cries reverberated with sinister fervor. “Our path shall prevail! May the legacy of Arck Drubble reign eternally throughout the omni-sphere!”

In the next instant, another prophecy came true. The Illuminator arrived. Pierced by beams of neon green brilliance, the attackers stumbled and evaporated. The Illuminator then commenced its restoration of the city while simultaneously vaporizing the flood of intrusion. Wrecked shards of the city floated and reassembled in mid-air, connecting in various new patterns.

The first phase of the re-building process had completed by the next day. Resting atop the highest stack of re-ordered debris, the Illuminator stoically contemplated yesterday’s battle.

Act 2:

The spiraling peaks of T’dar-Glom stood directly in the center of the volcanic tundra of Buh. Beneath the ice and magma, Arck Drubble’s subterranean dungeons concealed an unfathomable grimness.

“We must prepare for another attack,” Drubble muttered in a vicious growl. An infinite army of undead cyborg ostriches flapped their wings in agreement. In a few moments, the flock stampeded rapidly through the layers of fire and frost. The vile ostriches pillaged several villages before exiting the Buh wastelands.

Act 3:

Upon arrival in Aegnar, the vast flock of evil encountered an equally vast swarm of sword-wielding amphibian-riders. The ostrich-cyber-gouls belched streams of fire at their adversaries. In response, the Aegnarian blades sliced through the undead flesh circuitry-flesh of the avian hordes. Ultimately, the opposing forces reached a stale mate, leaving very few survivors. The lack of actual victory severely weakened the two competing empires, which crumbled slowly throughout the next century.

Act 4:

Four ominous starships finished their massive voyage across the barren void of space. They stopped finally at the planet known only as Uwaa. While entering the planet’s atmosphere, the vessels emitted beams of blinding neon blue. The four blue lights quickly evaporated the ruins of Aegnar, T’dar-Glom, and every other form of civilization. Only the various non-humanoid beasts and plant-life had been left intact.

The four lights turned orange as they switched to an alternate mode of operation. The beams pulled the creatures and vegetation into the cargo bays of the four starships. Within 80 hours, the harvesting process had  completed. The unexpected visitors thrust away from Uwaa, searching for their next destination.

An interview with Heosphoros:

STFUAJPGM: How long have you been writing metal music (chip or not)?

HEOSPHOROS: I’ve been composing metal music for 8 years.

STFUAJPGM: What tools do you use to make your music? Do certain chip sets have a more metal sound?

HEOSPHOROS: In the chip sense, I compose MIDI Metal and NES Metal. For MIDI, I use a mixture of Cakewalk and tabing softwares. For the NES, I use Famitracker. I find that the NES’s square waves have a very meaty feel to them on the lower octaves which really add to the “heaviness” of the music. The SID chip also has some very awesome tones and can achieve a very heavy sound. Some FM chip based video game systems use more emulated distorted guitars, but I personally find it doesn’t hold the same appeal as dirty square waves.

STFUAJPGM: How would you define “true chip metal?”

HEOSPHOROS: In my opinion it all lies on where your heart is when composing. There is a new trend of various types of “core” influenced chip music which label themselves as Chip Metal. However, they’re neglecting the origins and soul found within classic metal.

Credits:

Heosphoros: A Traditional Childrens Waltz

Monsters: Two Minutes and Thirty Seconds

NESMETAL: #150

Norrin Radd: Four Lights

Story Written by Spamtron

Art: ‘Hastur’ by Helm

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Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Act 1:

Forty years later, all he had left were his memories. Thoughts and recollections of past doings – the majority of which were accompanied by the vision of a single face. He had forgotten many details of their short lived adventure, but the one thing he could never forget was their bond. He closed his eyes one last time.

Act 2:

He saw waves breaking in the distance as their ship sailed further and further from land. Looking back towards the sunbathers on the shore, he saw that they seemed to become grains of sands themselves. They eventually grew smaller and would soon vanish completely.

Act 3:

The ship’s sail whipped in the wind as they sat side by side. Each stared through a set of binoculars in opposite directions. They shared a sense of comfort in the fact that there wouldn’t be anyone around to offer help, even if they were to need it.

Act 4:

Nightfall in the middle of the Pacific. The moon’s shattered reflection lit their path until it was time to retire. Each slept a gentle sleep after a full meal and a shared bottle of wine. They slept for what seemed the right amount of time. Neither of them knew that only one would awake to see the next day’s sunrise.

Act 5:

He could feel the the waves crashing atop his body. He was lying face down on the shore of a barren island. As he came to his senses and inspected his surroundings he realized that he was alone. His companion had assumably washed away with their boat. He collapsed to the ground, and sat for a long while staring at the sun. He knew that the sunlight would eventually blind him, but did not care. He didn’t see the point in having new experiences if he didn’t have anyone to share them with.

Credits:

Act 1: Music by Derris Kharlan & Disasterpeace (Venn & Euler) : Wagering Lights. Art by Andrio.

Act 2: Music by Dr. Jacko & Okeanos: Romance. Art by Norock.

Act 3: Music by Coda & Nobuyuki: Junction. Art by Brndn.

Act 4: Music by Beek & Virt: Fruitbat. Art by ZenAlbatross.

Act 5: Music by C-jeff & Random: Marine. Art by Crystal Labs.

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Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

In late 1988, the great professor Philip Henry Guttenburg Von Datamosh XIII disappeared from his home laboratory. He was known for his immense knowledge in many fields, as he held 9 doctorates in an array of fields including Ancient History, Computer Sciences, and Music Composition. The last known footage of VonDatamosh was taken from a security camera in his home. He was seen turning on his NES and Particle Field Generator at the same time. Years later, his journal was found in the very spot that he was last seen standing. The following are excerpts from his journal. It is assumed that he somehow traveled to another world

Act 1:

The group shared one of their many great musical masterpieces with me tonight. Its lyrics described dampening the moon’s glare by placing darkly shaded glass in front of their eyes: something of a right of passage for many of the tribe’s youngsters. I’m confident that these people not only hide from the moon, but also the sun. But what are they afraid of?

Act 2:

Curiously, the people of this world (the Bitteans, I have come call them) seem to worship many of the same figureheads as those of Earth have. I haven’t slept in days, as the tribe has been chanting about a man who’s thick horn-rimmed glasses gave him the ability to persuade a young woman named Mary into loving him. Something like Jesus and Mary, one might assume. These customs have grown exhausting.

Act 3:

Beetles. These people love beetles. What’s the big deal with beetles? Is this the same kind of worship that the Egyptians had for the scarab? Not sure about the subject matter of their music, but I do know that they produce a beautiful melody when making these sounds. As many as four tribesmen harmonize to create an appealing song… even if they are only singing for bugs.

Act 4:

I think I’m being courted. A woman parading about in a conically shaped bra sang a song to me. Her voice was beautiful, but sounded like a shrieking hyena when compared to Earth’s greatest vocalist. Hit me, Britney. One more time…

Act 5:

Party time! When I tell the Bitteans how much I miss my own world, they try to cheer me up. Their waving arms, enormous smiles, and gyrating hips lighten my mood. I feel like the happiest man on Earth… or wherever I am.

Act 6:

Some party that was… they’ve locked me up in some sort of cage. I thought they were just putting me to bed. I ate too much food. I’m very full. I need a nap, but am afraid to fall asleep. They stare at me through the bars. I’m… not sure… what they want from me… wait a minute. This isn’t a hot tub… what the hell is happening here?

Act 7:

How sad. I’ve ventured into another world. I’ve lived with its inhabitants. I’ve followed their traditions. I’ve said nice things about their wives (even though they aren’t really that pretty). I’ve eaten their strange foods, only to become food myself. I’m frightened. Why am I still writing in this book? I should be saying my prayers.

Track Listing:

Active Knowledge: Sunglasses at Night (Originally by Corey Hart)

Nordloef: Buddy Holly (originally by Weezer), from Weezer – The 8-bit Album

Sloopygoop: Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (originally by The Beatles), from Wanna Hld Yr Handheld, Vol. 1

TDM and Factor6: Hung Up (Originally by Madonna)

dotdUmmy: Fiesta (originally by Ween)

Buskerdroid: London Dungeon (Originally by The Misfits), from Eightbreeders

Syphus: Save A Prayer (originally by Duran Duran)

(Editor’s Note: Obviously, these are all cover songs. I can’t urge the reader enough to check out the artists’ original music. Seriously. Just follow the links.)

“STFUAJPGM’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” by NOROCK:

Glomag: Transmission (Originally by Joy Division). Video by: EM Dash.

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Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Act 1:

Upon first sight, she knew it was meant to be. Her eyes almost seemed to lose focus as an array of overwhelming thoughts and feelings soaked her already addled mind. She saw colors. She saw visions. She wondered if the people around her could feel the gaze she sent across the room.

Act 2:

Things seemed to silence for a moment when He stared back. Their eyes locked only for milliseconds before suddenly pulling away. Instead of flashing a smile, her stomach dropped. People began dancing as the music in the background began once again.

Act 3:

She tried to stay cool. He tried to stay calm. She avoided facing the side of the room in which he stood. He laughed as though his friends were the funniest people in the room. She pushed her hair behind her ear. He brushed away the wrinkles in his shirt. Her friends pushed her towards him. His friends pushed him towards her.

Act 4:

They seemed to stumble in unison as their drinks nearly spilled. Recovering from said embarrassing events they both recovered their balance and stood tall. She smiled and waved. He scratched the back of his head and responded with a grin. “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” they both asked at the same time.

Act 5:

They should have known that their responses would be the same. “I think so…” they both muttered. At that moment, each remembered their previous night’s dream. They remembered staring into each others eyes as they danced closely. They remembered the sounds of the music around them. They remembered the kiss that they would soon share. For the first time that each could remember, they felt calm in spite of their shared chaotic environment.

Track Listing:

Spamtron: Water Dripping in the Metvl Cave of Count Chocula

Syphus: Pennies / Fuelship (From 8 Bit Peoples 100)

Albino Ghost Monkey: Regardless

Zabutom: Mushroom Soup

ok ikumi: White Plains 96

STFUAJPGM had a contest. It asked listeners to send in an explanation as to why they love chip music. The results were glorious. How could one not agree with the following statements?

Zack Koeneke wrote:

“I love chiptunes because they take me back to my childhood, a time where composers like Koji Kondo and Masato Nakamura led me into the magical dreamscapes of the Mushroom Kingdom and the Mystic Cave Zone through their simple, catchy, and quality music. While graphics and gameplay have seem to get better and better with every new console generation, original music in games seem to have peaked in the 8 and 16-bit eras.

Thankfully, instead of completely turning our backs to chiptunes to embrace new technology, there have been very dedicated people who have chosen to continue to support chiptunes. Being limited to the “bleeps” and “bloops” of yesteryear, chiptune artists have been forced to innovate constantly. This massive amount of innovation confirms to me that chiptunes are an invaluable part of today’s (and the future’s) music scene and contain some of the most sharpened musical pieces on Earth.”

An anonymous submitter succintly explains their viewpoint:

“I love chiptune because its fucking awesome.”

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Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Curated by Joe Allen of Gamewave Podcast

Act 1: The message traveled through space and time at the speed of light. In terms of Earth years, it traversed asteroid fields, circumnavigated celestial bodies, and passed through dying stars for nearly 300 hundred years. It traveled alone from an unknown origin. With seemingly great determination, the signal finally found its destination: a small blue and green planet inhabited by creatures whose evolution had only slightly surpassed that of amphibians.

Act 2: All was well on Earth that day. But as the grass swayed and the waves crashed on the shore, something felt slightly off. This day was different than any other. The scientists who had been monitoring the cosmos’ pulse detected something other than a flat line response. They received a message from an unknown sender. After much commotion, they decided that this was a call they could not afford to miss.

Act 3: Decades passed as the humans focused their combined effort into returning the historic call. Eventually, humanity’s technology reached the point of being able to send two brave volunteers on a one way trip towards the transmission’s origin. Of the two selected, one was a Mercenary and one was a Pacifist. For nearly 30 decades, each slept in cryogenic chambers that would eventually open with an uneasy gasp.

Act 4: Both Mercenary and Pacifist looked out of the single window on their craft. They saw a planet thickly covered in gaseous clouds. As their ship neared the planet’s surface, they saw what they believed to be massive flames. For a split second they were reminded of their families who had died hundreds of years earlier, and at the same time looked ahead into their future. They were about to explore their new home. Each was afraid. Each had an upset stomach.

Act 5: The astronauts stepped out of their craft. They saw buildings. They saw structures. They saw architecture in flames. Perhaps they had arrived too late. As they took a few more steps, they noticed a group of the world’s inhabitants inching towards them. They were shocked at the natives’ appearance, robed in dark shrouds. The natives floated towards the pilgrims. Fearing what could happen, the Mercenary began to fire his weapons. At the same time, the Pacifist closed his eyes hoping that everything would be alright. A bright wave of light washed over him. Everything faded away as he took a deep breath.

Act 6: When he opened his eyes, the Pacifist found himself sitting at a table in an all white room. Across from him was an inhabitant of this new world. The native slid a black box across the table. The Pacifist looked at the apparent gift, not knowing what to do with it. The only thing he could do was stare. After quite some while, the Pacifist looked towards his alien counterpart. He saw the corners of the creature’s mouth raise, creating a sense of comfort in the room. The Pacifist extended his hand, hoping that his gesture would be understood as a symbol of commonality between the two. Moments later, their hands met. The pacifist looked into his new friend’s eyes and realized that they were the same color as his own.

Track Listing:

x|k: Transmissions

Rushjet1: Nebula

Skip: Rocketship

SLiVeR: The Alien Agenda

Sabrepulse: Astronaut

Phlogiston: Cosmic Dust

Art by x|k (Be sure to check out the full res versions, here.)

Human Space Invaders from Albert Martin.

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Music has been reproduced in accordance with the Creative Commons BY-NC-SA License. All credit is given to the respective musicians.

Act 6:

John had been following the people he had met earlier. As he drove he wondered what they talked about. Even though their van was only meters in front of him, he imagined their conversations to be light years ahead of anything he could comprehend. As the sun finally gave up, and allowed the moon to be in control, he pulled into a busy parking lot. Beyond the rows of parked cars, he saw a marquee above a seemingly abandoned building. The marquee’s sign displayed a simple slogan: “Live Music”

He slowly opened his car door, took a deep breath, and began his approach. He didn’t even consider whether or not he had locked his door. On some deep and distant level, he knew that his once important belongings would be safe.

As John entered the building, his eyelids peeled back at an uncontrollable rate. With his mouth agape, he attempted to understand what each of his senses were telling him. It was almost too much. The bright lights, the pounding beats, and the people he had met earlier dancing to an undeniably unique sound. On stage John saw a individual crouched over a small and mysterious device: an object he had once associated with his childhood. He felt his heart beating in unison with the music, and knew that he had found a new home.

Track Listing:

Fighter X, Live at NW Folklife

Bitshifter, Live at Blipfest ‘08

Nullsleep, Live at Blipfest ‘08

Sabrepulse, Live at NW Folklife

A special thanks goes to the kind contributors of this episode: Crunchy Co., Zen Albatross, Brendan at MAGFest, and B. Leo.

An interview with Fighter X:

STFUAJPGM: What tools do you use during a live performance?

Fighter X: Lately, I’ve been using two original Game Boys with Little Sound DJ carts. I have both of them running through my Korg Zero4 DJ mixer. You could say I was a hyperactive DJ on stage, but with handheld consoles instead of two turntables. Sometimes I’ll throw an extra Game Boy in the mix, which can make my set easier (but waste away my precious Duracells). I don’t have to switch carts between Game Boys at all when I have a 3 Game Boy setup – since I use 3 LSDJ carts live, at every show. I wish I could use my nifty push-button Speak & Spell during my live sets…..but the main output is busted…

STFUAJPGM: How does your music change in a live environment?

Fighter X: If you were to listen to oh, let’s say my upcoming full-length album this September, and then come to a Fighter X show and hear those exact same tracks, I think people could definitely tell a difference. I enjoy playing my songs differently than the way they were recorded. I can put many different audio effects on my live music whether it be my DJ mixer, or my Kaoss Pad if I decide to bring it to a show. In Little Sound DJ, there are many different ways to modify a live track. It’s all so easy and fun.

STFUAJPGM: What is the motivation behind the Lo-Tek Resistance series?

Fighter X: Lo-Tek Resistance is meant to spread awareness of the small, unique, local chiptune scene here in Seattle. Chiptune music is known by NO ONE, and I think putting on monthly busking events here in Seattle really helps the scene. I’ve been preparing the LTR for the upcoming Penny Arcade Expo in Seattle! It’s by far the best Lo-Tek event of the year. September 4th outside of PAX! BE THERE!

An interview with No Carrier:

STFUAJPGM: Can you describe what you do in a sentence or two?

No Carrier: I write software for classic consoles and computers to provide visuals at live music events. Some people call it VJ’ing, but there aren’t any video clips involved with my work – its all coming from the hardware in real time.

STFUAJPGM: What tools do you use during a live performance?

No Carrier: I use a couple of NES systems and C64’s, as well as a video mixer. All of the software is my own.

STFUAJPGM: What inspired you to start manipulating hardware?

No Carrier: I really like chip music – and I love the hardware aspect of real performance, meaning hearing Game Boy or NES music live on classic consoles. I like to think of it as completing the experience, and using hardware to make visuals to complement the music.

STFUAJPGM: Is your work inspired more by music or games?

No Carrier: Music, for sure. As a longtime DJ, music is what drives me to create new software. I love creating custom software to match the style of specific artists or genres.

STFUAJPGM: How does a live music environment affect your work?

No Carrier: Live music drives my choices as a live visualist. Most of my software is written for live use – meaning that the speed, colors, or patterns can change with the press of a button. I use that to match the music and give a unified feel for the event attendee. Its always a good feeling when people ask me if the visuals are synced to the music. I work hard to manually beatmatch everything and keep it tight.

STFUAJPGM: Does having an audience affect your work? How?

No Carrier: One big aspect of doing live visuals is that I’m usually facing the stage, with the audience. It is a lot different than being on stage, because you get the vibe of the crowd. I’m usually behind my table, running my software and dancing as well. It sounds funny, but its true. There is something cool about performing at crowd level. You’re much more in tune with people, and not as separated as being on stage.

A live chiptune performance. Music: Random, Visuals: No Carrier, Video: Saskrotch

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